Heading Home

There are fast days in the adoption process and there are slow days.  Today was a slow day.  Our paperwork is in hand, passports and visas are secured, bags are packed, and the Grubbs are ready to head home.  Today has been filled with saying our goodbyes to several adoptive families that have become friends over the past two weeks.  Many of them are taking a train to Hong Kong and flying out to the states from there tomorrow morning.  We pray for traveling mercies for each our friends.

As we say these goodbyes we notice several families just now entering into Guangzhou.  Husbands and wives step out of taxis and there is a look in their eyes - a look of anticipation.  They flew into China occupying two seats and they will fly out using three.  Natalie and I watch with excitement for them, often times looking down at our Ruthie in amazement.  Just two weeks ago we were in their shoes and we too were filled with anticipation, questions, and our share of nervousness.    Now there's sheer gratitude.  In those two weeks, Ruthie has grown ever more trusting of us as her parents and we have grown in unimaginable love for her.  Come Thursday evening (US Eastern time) little Ruthie Noel Grubbs' feet will touch down on American soil, she will become a US citizen, meet her brothers for the first time, and will begin the wonderful journey of learning that is "Good to be a Grubbs".    

Much has happened since our last post so here is a rushed attempt to catch you up:

• Saturday (June 2) -  Ruthie had her medical exam here in China and had her picture taken for her visa.  Her exam went well but we have established that Ruthie does not like people in white coats.
• Monday (June 4) - we received Ruthie's Chinese passport and spent a few hours at the Guangzhou zoo.
• Tuesday (June 5) - The Grubbs visited the US Consulate here in Guangzhou, took our oath before a room crowded with other adopted families, and Ruthie legally became part of our family according to US law (the Chinese government legally declared her part of our family the previous Tuesday)
• Wednesday (June 6) - The Grubbs visit Shamian Island and received Ruthie's visa.  The Chinese government requires individuals to be in country at least 24 hours after receiving visa - which puts our departure date for Thursday June 7 (12:40pm).  We'll fly from Guangzhou to Seoul then on to Atlanta.  

The Grubbs girls take China by storm - beginning with a stroll through the park of Guangzhou.  These two command an audience wherever they go.   

Dinner with fellow Lifeline friends - a group of adoptive families from various parts of the country.

Law and Fletch - the wildlife pics are for you guys.  

Ruthie was born in 2010 - the year of the TIGER

Just loved this picture of Nat - there will be repercussions for this posting later I'm sure.  "Love you Beautiful!" 

Pandas in China

This is a Jaguar.  Ever since watching his first Diego episode, Fletcher has been fascinated with jaguars.

First time at the pool.  Before this outing bath time was a wrestling match in the Grubbs family.  The visit to the pool really opened Ruthie up to the water.  We've come a long way with bath time (i.e., no more wrestling matches!).

The next few are some of the many expressions of Ruthie

Dolled up for our group photo

Lifeline group

This was a common sight during our visit to China.  Natalie and Ruthie surrounded by inquisitive locals.  They were always mesmerized by a beautiful red head with gorgeous China daughter in tow.  The majority of them always wanted to know if Ruthie was from China - which made us laugh hysterically.

Waiting to board our dinner boat tour on Shamian Island

Shamian Island has several dinner boats that run along the Pearl river giving evening tours of the city.

The Grubbs with the world's second largest tower in the background.

Long morning of sightseeing.

Nat made a great friend in Angie from Missouri.  She was a part of the same group adopting through Lifeline.

Three passports packed and ready to go.  Atlanta here we come!

what a difference a week makes...

I am just pinching myself realizing all the millions of changes we have been through exactly this time, just one week ago.  Before Ruthie came, minutes took hours and now they are quite quick.  Here are some of the other changes as well.

• We actually worked out in this beautiful gym here...now we just look down at it from our room. :)
• We are finally on this time zone...just in time to switch again.
• Ruthie no longer cries "mama mao" when she's upset.  
• Ruthie clings to us when we're out...but not bc she's scared, but bc she loves us.
• Going out is no big deal: it was horrifying when we didn't know her yet.
• Ruthie actually rode in a stroller today, and loved it!!  There is no way we could have done that a few days ago.
• This week, Ruthie no longer has diarrhea, fever, an ear infection, no more teething, and her yeast infection is clearing up too.  wade and i say that she'll think these new parents are full of medicine...she'll probably grieve when we're all done with antibiotics. :)
• I miss my boys even more today than i did a week ago...we're so close to seeing them, i can almost smell them...
• I am getting somewhat used to the stares...you'd think having red hair around her makes you as famous as Justin Beiber.  (i don't even know if i spelled his name right. :) )
• Ruthie laughs now.
• She is almost up for walking...she stood for the first time yesterday for a whole 5 minutes...her little chicken legs were shaking the whole time. (She CAN walk and run, she just won't yet. haha  I'm sure she thinks if she lets us know she is capable that we won't carry her cute little 16 pound body around anymore....Ruthie, you don't know your mama!  I still carry your brothers!)
• She doesn't cry when she wakes up anymore.
• She still cries in the bath.
• wade has become an expert tea partier.  

Can't wait to be home!!!!!!

Thank You Lifeline

Today our schedule was full of medical exams and paperwork.  Ruthie officially doesn't like doctor's and daddy officially doesn't like paperwork.


Many of our family and friends have expressed an inability to view the previously posted videos and are thus revolting.  So here is a reposting of earlier videos in a different format.  

In this post we would also like to express gratitude.  We have worked with an absolutely wonderful adoption agency in this process. Lifeline Children’s Services (www.lifelineadoption.org) cares for children through adoption, foster care, and a variety of other ministries in both the United States and around the world. 

Recently, Lifeline entered into a partnership with this orphanage in MaoMing to care for the approximately 60 special needs children who live here.  Lifeline’s goal is to find parents for as many of these children as possible, in addition to providing support for children with severe special needs. We met several of these kids yesterday, some of whom have already been matched through Lifeline, and others who are still waiting for a family to adopt them. They have varying special needs, and many of them are minor.  There are detailed profiles of waiting children in this MaoMing orphanage HERE, and we recently learned that Lifeline has entered into additional relationships with 5 other orphanages in China alone.  The outstanding work they do is being noticed by the government here. 

As we interacted with these children, it was clear that the primary special need each one of them has is a mom and dad who will give them a family and a home.  I know that if you are reading this blog, you likely weren’t ready for an invitation to adopt at the end of this post. But I must say that I have also prayed for this moment. For the moment when someone reads this blog, sees one of the other children on the MaoMing page now or in the days ahead, or another child altogether, and the Lord moves your heart to at least consider the potential of making this journey your own. A host of questions and concerns may come to your mind when you even consider adoption, and there are amazing people at Lifeline (as well as other agencies) who would love to help you process through those. I’m convinced that such questions and concerns will ultimately prove to be opportunities for God to show His faithfulness in ways you never could have imagined. Our Father is committed to providing for the fatherless, and I trust that He will grant you grace to follow Him if He is leading you to become a part of His plan to care for one of these precious children in need.

Lifeline, we thank you!

Sorry this video is upside down.  Operational error on my part.  Please turn your computers upside down to compensate!

Visit to MaoMing

Yesterday was an emotional day, to say the least. We laughed. We wept. And in it all, we worshiped. The Father to the fatherless is providing for orphans, and you and I have the privilege of being a part of His plan. We’ll start from the beginning.

After a four hour car ride, we arrived at the special needs orphanage in Maoming, China. This city of six million people is where Ruthie was born just eighteen months ago.  We drove through the gate—the same gate where 16 months ago, our daughter was left early one morning in a brown paper box. It is illegal for a woman to abandon her baby; consequently, children are left periodically in the early morning while it is still dark. The orphanage staff believes that Ruthie's family learned of her heart condition, and a short time later placed her at the gate just before dawn.  

Our visit was important, yet difficult, as Ruthie had opportunity to interact with the children she has been around and caregivers who have nurtured her.  We hope that this time offered her a bit of closure while also giving us a glimpse of her life to this point.  We had prepared for the worst as we knew of families who had very difficult days with their children wanting their old life.  And since Ruthie was very attached to her nanny we were very mindful of this possibility.  To our amazement, Ruthie seemed to remain very attached to us while at the orphanage, exhibiting no desire to go back to the women who had cared for her the past sixteen months.  We could tell that Ruthie's reaction took the staff by surprise as her main nanny left without saying goodbye.  We know she was sad and understandably so.  As we walked away from the day we realized God was kind to us here.  

Here are pics and vids from the day.  

Playtime before our long car ride

Ruthie has become a huge fan of elevator rides.  The girl is a little social butterfly, so any opportunity to leave the room and go outside is met with much excitement.

Car ride to Maoming.  And yes children's car seats are not required in China. which is scary by itself.  When you see the traffic in China the notion of no car seats becomes even more terrifying.

Today was children's day in China which equals massive crowds.  Above is a typical market in Maoming - fresh pork and fish with no ice = yum!

Stopped at the Maoming Walmart to pick up gifts/supplies for the orphanage.

After spending time in a couple of other different places in the orphanage, our next stop was the floor where Ruthie used to live, eat, sleep, and play. We were looking forward to this moment, and we had prayed intentionally for it. Knowing that just one week ago today, Ruthie was taken from this place to a totally different city and placed in the arms of completely foreign people, we were not sure how she would react to being back. Similarly, we were not sure how the caregivers at the orphanage would react, especially her primary caregiver. We had seen one particular woman in most of Ruthie's pictures, and we had been told that she was the primary person to care for her over the last 16 months. This one woman had held our little girl, fed her, nurtured her, changed her diapers, cared for her when she was sick, played with her, taught her, and simply been the most important person in Ruthie's life to this point. We knew that meeting this caregiver would be an emotional moment on a variety of different levels—for Ruthie, for the caregiver, and for us—and we had prayed specifically for that time. We wanted this woman to know how grateful we are to her.

Ruthie clings tight to mama at the orphanage (which was such a blessing to mama!).  The woman in the pink glasses was one of Ruthie's primary caregivers at the orphanage.  This woman LOVED SiFang and would eventually leave our time together crying.  A bitter sweet reunion as I know she is glad that Ruthie has a home, but sad too because she has great affection for our little girl.  To have Ruthie hold tight to mama during this time was a great testimony to the bond she has already made with Natalie.

Picture time with the some of the orphanage staff in Ruthie's old playroom.  The staff member on the far left is the Maoming orphanage director.  She was incredibly kind during visit and cares for the children very much.  She knows each of one of them in great detail.

Many of the children have pictures posted on the walls of the playroom.   Here's a few of our Ruthie

Thought this was a sweet picture here - Natalie and Ruthie playing on the floor with old toys while "nanny" looked on.  To think, only five short days ago, it would have been this nanny taking care of our little Ruthie.   

Make shift toys in the orphanage 

Overlooking the orphanage courtyard. This building predominantly houses children of various ages, though there is also an area where senior adults are cared for in assisted living. Different floors contain classrooms, eating areas, playrooms, and bedrooms (full with either beds or cribs). 

Orphanage construction

View of the neighborhood surrounding the orphanage.

Of course, Ruthie would pick out the pink tutu!

Ruthie's finding place - this is a spot just outside the gate of the orphanage.  

Neighborhood opposite of Ruthie's finding spot.  As Natalie mentioned in a previous post, we couldn't help but think of Ruthie's birth mother and the prospect that she still lived close by.

Neighborhood playground down the street.

Street of Maoming orphanage.

Couldn't help myself with the next few pics.  These are some of my girl on the way back from Maoming.  She feels safe and comfortable and for this we are grateful.

Picture entering Guangzhou

This was our fearless driver for the trip.  You wouldn't believe the traffic here in China even if I described it (unless you've been here before).  Let's just say they use horns instead of brake lights and blinkers.  By the end of our trip, we were glad this guys was driving instead of us.

a mother's point of view

I realize that there are just more things to think about and write about than i could possibly put here.  And wade is about to publish a post with all of the details of our Maoming trip to the orphanage.  (Thank you Wade!  I could not possibly desire to sit here and wait for pictures to upload...)

But one thing i do always want to remember is being where Ruthie's birth mother left her.  The place was right outside of the orphanage gate.  There are two orphanages on that road, so I am guessing that she left her at that specific one because she lives near.  I looked around at the apartments and wondered if she was still close by.  I grieved for her mama....in all of the books i have read, many mothers are forced to leave their "unperfect" children because they, themselves, are abandoned by their family if they keep their child. Without a job or food, both of them would die.  I thought about my sweet Ruthie, for she had to be left in the middle of the night so that no one could find her mother and throw her in jail.  What a terrible night for both of them.  She was found in a box the next morning...the orphanage director, even though she has over 200 children to think about, remembered Sifang.

As I held her in that spot, she really became mine.  I can not even tell you, unless you've done this before, what a sad and joyful moment it is.  And all the while, your daughter has  no idea.  I studied the bricks, the smells, the ground....someday i'll let her know...but for now, i'll hold it close to my heart.

I told her, "Ruthie, your mother loved you a lot...she risked being found so that you would live."  

On the way home, i told wade, (as bad as this seems) I'm so glad she was left so that I could have her.  God does work through terrible things, and I'm so grateful that she is mine.